As my departure draws closer, the days seem to evaporate into a puff of hazy, quickly swirling vapor. I am focused but also experiencing the carefree and lucid mindset of the adventurous traveler. The things that usually matter on a day to day basis do not and I am no longer making plans in my Virginian community. I am also not making many plans for my future home in Coronado because I am ready to arrive and feel the place out in order to get a sense of how to plan things. Sure, I have my future gym picked out and my son is enrolled in pre-school for the fall. But I have let go of the persnickety planning that I used to do and it feels great. The adventure is beginning to unfold.
It does help that I am familiar with San Diego. I used to live there five years ago and am excited to experience the nostalgia but curious to see how things have changed. A lot can happen in five years! After all, we have had two children and experienced a lot of growth ourselves. I am sure that San Diego has grown too.
I chose to drive with my two boys across the country and am excited, although realistically wondering what kind of trouble I am getting myself into! We are stopping a lot along the way to visit family and friends all over the map. This is the kind of adventure that I have craved for years now. Yes, I know that it will be a challenge with my little munchkins along for the experience but I would have it no other way. They are really good in the car and this will test their little mettles.
My excitement and anticipation grow as I prepare for and dream of all the great times we might have in Southern California. I have said my goodbyes to everyone and had one more night of fun in Virginia this past Thursday with Lauren and Brook. It is bittersweet but as I have learned from all my other moves; it is one of the best opportunities for growth that I found. It tests your friendships and provides a new path for your relationships to travel upon. In July, I will hop North to Napa and visit my friend Stephanie who will be flying in from Virginia to stay at her home there and run a half marathon. I might never have done that with her if I had stayed in Virginia.
This time of expansion is a bit scary but I am up for the challenge; more so, I am ready to do this. It is time.
I have my days of almost pure stress because I am trying to juggle several things at once and have no good cushion to land on because my security here in Virginia is no longer something to rely on. I am learning how to avoid the trap of stress induced anxiety which leads to me being a less effective parent. I am learning that I do not need the securities that I always relied on before in order to provide a safe and loving environment for my children. Of course, I look forward to having some of it again once we land in our new community but know that it is not a necessity. The life of a military family is often exciting with a little bit of drama but a whole lot of love. One thing is for sure. It gives you, as my Dad always said, “… gravel in your gut.” It is positively one heck of an adventure and my gratitude is constant. I treasure my family, my friends and this beautiful country that I am about to travel the old school way…kids screaming and all:)